Everyone has experienced that vague feeling that something “just isn’t right,” only to discover that there really was a reason for it. In his now-classic work, The Gift of Fear: Survival Signals That Protect Us from Violence, author Gavin de Becker explains it this way:
“You have the gift of a brilliant internal guardian that stands ready to warn you of hazards and guide you through risky situations.”
Note that what we sometimes call “instinct” is actually intuition, but they are not the same. Without going into a long (and arcane) psychological discussion, suffice it to say that instinct is hardwired into our DNA: the startle reflex when we hear a loud noise or the sudden jolt of adrenaline when we are about to make a sky-diving jump (or find ourselves openly threatened by another person or persons).
Intuition, on the other hand, is the result of our accumulated life experiences, which become unconsciously stored as information. This internal “database” is what gives us the ability to interpret barely noticeable signals from the people and conditions around us.
Thus, while everyone will react in a similar fashion to a sudden loud noise, not everyone will react to seemingly insignificant social signals in the same way (because everyone’s life experiences are different).
For example, I grew up in Chicago. Having worked in the middle of downtown, as well as in some of the more high-crime areas of the city, I can pick out a drug dealer’s “lookout” standing on a street corner almost instantly or determine with great accuracy if a group of young men standing on the corner is a potential threat.
But those reactions are the result of “conscious awareness,” which is one of the fundamentals of self-defense. Then there are those occasions where I could not point to anything specific that would represent a threat, but did have that previously mentioned “something just isn’t right” feeling. And, in every case, the feeling proved to be justified.
On the other hand, before coming to the United States as an adult, a South African friend of mine spent most of his life in rural Africa. As a result, he was remarkably attuned to subtle warning signs in the African bush (where I would have been the one who was clueless).
But since he had no experience with the kinds of people and environments that exist in most American inner cities, he had no internal references to warn him of situations that, for me, set off alarm bells immediately. After one such incident, which he later admitted he did not see coming, he asked, “How did you know that?”
I referred him once again to Gavin de Becker, who said:
“Intuition is always right in at least two important ways; it is always in response to something, and it always has your best interest at heart.”
Both instinct and intuition exist to keep us safe. But unfortunately, humans have a tendency to engage in denial by discounting the subtle warnings, then ultimately regretting it. Look how many times you’ve heard someone say, “I had a feeling it was a mistake, but…”
I encourage everyone, whether they carry a firearm or not, to get The Gift of Fear and read it. Then give it to someone you care about: your spouse, your children, a friend.
But always, listen to your “gut” — it may one day save your life. It has mine.
